Campin' Up
by Ninjazz
Summary: No Raccoon City, no zombies, no viral spills...Just a regular camping trip!
1. Setting Up

****Okay, I know it's been a LONG time since I posted any updated chapters, or new stories, or anything at all really! I usually have a billion reasons, but not this time. I'm just distracted, that's my excuse. Sorry!**

**Anyways, here's a new one I've been working on...It's nothing fancy, but the idea came to me and I decided to run with it. Hope it's not TOO bad! Lots of dorkyness, but still no porn. Suckers!****

"It's all written right here," said Jill, looking down into an instructions manual.

Chris ignored her, keeping his attention on the task at hand; assembling a tent. It was a really elaborate process, but he was convinced that once he figured out how each part worked, he could do it.

"They even have pictures showing each step," Jill added.

"I don't need pictures."  
>"Clearly."<br>Chris looked up. "Jill, seriously, I got this."

Jill kept her eyes on the manual. "I never thought I'd see the day when a stick-man managed to do something you can't do," she said.

The tent-pole spiked into the ground at her feet, causing her to look up. Chris' face was slightly red. "I can do this, but you sitting there criticizing doesn't help. Now, either you help me, or leave me alone," he said.

"Gees, calm down will you? I could swear you're being jealous or something," said Jill.

"Jealous of what?" asked Chris.

"Of the stick-man."  
>"Why would I be jealous of a stick-man?" he asked. The red in his face was now replaced by a very confused expression.<p>

"Because he can do things better than you," replied Jill.

"That's stupid," said Chris.

She looked back down at the manual. "I mean, he's not very attractive, definitely lacking muscles and all...but he does have this slight manliness about him, the way he's pitching that tent so well-" before she could finish mocking him, Chris took the manual out from her grip and tossed it aside.

"I'm way more manly than a stick-man in some stupid instructions manual," he said.

"Sure, dear," said Jill, holding back a grin. She got up and walked off in the woods to where the other tent was being pitched. _I wonder if I can bug Leon just as much with his tent,_ she thought, laughing to herself.

Chris watched her go and sighed. He waited until she was completely out of sight before picking up the discarded manual and finding the step he was out. "Alright, stick-dude, it's just you and me now," he said.

"Dude, that's sick."

Chris dropped the manual and looked up to see his sister walking into the clearing. "Don't do that!" he said.

"Do what, sneak up on you when you're talking to your...stick-dude...?" she asked.

"I was talking to the stick-man in the manual," he said defensively.

Claire shook her head, turning to walk off where Jill had gone. "Sure, Chris, whatever floats your boat," she said.

"Instructions manual! For the tent!" he yelled after her.

Claire waved her hand as she walked as though shooing something away. "Whatever!" she yelled as she disappeared into the trees. Chris sighed, glaring at the manual. "This is why guys hate your kind...you always get us in trouble or make us look like idiots," he said.


	2. The Other Side

Leon was sitting in a lounge chair on the small beach; eyes closed, shoes off, no shirt, and entirely relaxed. It had taken him about five minutes to assemble his tent, and now he was taking in the sunshine, listening to the sounds of the waves hitting shore and the nearby unseen crickets. Nothing could ruin this moment.

"Hey Kennedy!"

Leon sighed and lowered his sunglasses over his eyes.

Next to him, Jill sat on a vacant chair. "How can you be relaxing at a time like this? It's setup time, don't you know?" she said.

"Tent's up, fire pit's ready, and I lost Claire, so I don't know what else I should be setting up," said Leon.

Jill raised a brow. "You lost Claire?" she asked.

"Yep."

"How so?" asked Jill.

"Well she ran off when I started getting stuff out for the tent. I guess she knew I was planning to ask for help," Leon said. He lifted his sunglasses and looked over. "So I finished my own work and came out here to enjoy the sun. What've you been doing?" he asked.

"Pissing off Chris...it seemed better than helping," said Jill. She looked around and sighed. "So, where is Claire anyways?"

Leon shrugged and put his sunglasses back on. As though on cue, Claire stepped out from the woods, kicking some sand around as she walked towards them. "Hey guys, what's going on?" she asked.

"Sure, NOW you appear," said Leon.

"What do you mean? I was around the whole time, just looking for fire wood," she said.

"And did you find any?"

"Well, no...There's none."

"It's a forest, Claire."

"Okay I didn't look," confessed Claire. "Besides, there's already a whole bunch in the pit."

Leon sat up and turned to look at her. "No shit, I put it there after you ran off!" he said.

"I didn't run off, I just went to see what Chris was up to!" she said.

"Are you two fighting?" asked Jill. They both looked at her and she shrugged. "Just asking."  
>"No, we're not fighting," said Leon, sighing.<p>

"I hope not, he's the one who told me to leave when we were getting the tent up," said Claire.

Jill grinned. "Why would you do that?" she asked, looking to Leon.

"She was distracting me!"

"How was I distracting you!" yelled Claire.

Leon shook his head. "Okay, lets' recap," he said.

**-Earlier that day-**

Chris grabbed a duffle-like bag out of the Jeep and tossed it to Leon. "Go find a clearing and set this up, will you? I mean, if you can handle it," he said, grinning.

"It's a tent, not a stadium, I think I'll manage," said Leon.

"Well, Claire can help you, she knows how," said Chris.

Leon shook his head and started towards the woods. "Are you sure YOU won't need the help? Make sure you follow the instructions well, wouldn't want that thing caving down halfway through the night, huh?" he said, grinning as he walked.

Chris glared at his back as it disappeared into the woods. "Why is he here again?" he asked.

Jill kept unloading stuff from the Jeep. "Claire wanted to bring him along," she said.

"And...I said yes?"

"Yes, Chris, you did. Are you planning on being all anti-Leon for the whole week?" asked Jill.

Chris turned and looked at her, then sighed and picked up the bag with the second tent. "I'll be nice," he said through gritted teeth.

Jill couldn't help it. She reached up and ruffled her hand through his hair like a child. "That's my boy! Playing nice with the other kids and all!" she said.

Chris shook his head and walked towards the other clearing they'd found. "Come on, you're about to see a record-break for setting up a tent!" he said.

* * *

><p>In the other clearing not so far away, Leon tossed the bag on the ground with a heavy sigh. "Your brother still hates me, and will always hate me," he said.<p>

Claire looked up from her search in the giant cooler. "Why would you say that?" she asked.

"Because, he always tries to make me look stupid or useless," said Leon. He opened the bag and started pulling out tent poles and pegs.

"Chris is like that with everyone, don't take it so personally. Hey, didn't we bring any sodas?" she asked, once again rummaging through the cooler. "There's just beer in here."

"Yeah, that would be the point of a beer-cooler, Claire," said Leon.

"So where's the soda?"

"There is no soda."

"So what am I supposed to drink?"

"I don't know...beer?"

"I'm underage, Leon."

Leon sighed. "We're in the middle of the woods, I don't think anyone will mind," he said.

"I should make Chris drive to the nearest town and get some sodas."

"Claire, forget about the drinks for a second...can you give me a hand with this pole?"

Claire grinned. "My my, mister Kennedy... alone for less than five minutes and you already need help with your pole? No wonder Chris hates you," she said.

"Hey, you said he didn't hate me!"

"I lied."

"You suck. Are you gonna help me, or not?"

"I am helping...I'm keeping you company!" she said.

Leon sighed again. "I guess that's fine...Just don't distract me," he said.

"How would I distract you?" asked Claire, stepping closer.

He looked at her and couldn't hold back a grin. "Gee, I wonder," he said.

"You mean, if I do something like this?" She reached up and kissed him, trying not to laugh.

Leon pushed her back. "Yes, exactly like that," he said.

"Oh come on, the tent can wait!"

"Go away, Claire, I want this done before it gets dark or Chris won't stop making fun of me," said Leon.

Claire sighed and turned away. "Okay fine, I'll go see what the master of tent-pitching is up to," she said.

Leon looked up but she was gone before he could say anything. He felt bad sending her off, but knew nothing would get done if she stuck around. That thought made him laugh, until he remembered there was way too much work to be done for just one person.


	3. Kicking Back

****I know I messed up the chapter-splitting on this, but this was the way it worked best. This follows directly after the previous chapter. Sorry if it caused confusion!****

Leon finished explaining the previous events with a sigh. "See what I mean?" he asked.

Jill nodded and turned to Claire. "I'm sure Chris would be real happy to hear this story," she said.

"No he wouldn't, he'd be pissed," said Claire.

"Sarcasm."

"Oh."

Leon turned and leaned back into his chair, lowering his shades. "Well if there's any work to do now, I call dibs on staying out of it. It's Claire's turn," he said.

"Not fair!" said Claire.

Jill laughed. "Actually, it's really fair," she said. "And hey if you guys want a good laugh, you can go bother Chris while he's trying to pitch a tent without instructions."

Claire grinned. "He's using them now, I was just there," she said.

"No way! Wow, he's seconds away from having a pissing contest with that stick-man," Jill said, laughing.

Leon raised a brow. "Stick-man?" he asked.

"From the instructions manual," said Jill.

Leon grinned. "See, I wouldn't know, since I didn't use a manual," he said proudly. "It doesn't take a genius to setup a tent, trust me I did it without Claire's help."

"...Are you calling me a genius?" asked Claire.

"No I'm not," said Leon.

"Sounds like you are."

"Yeah, Leon, kind of sounds like it," said Jill.

Leon scratched his head. "Well that's not how I meant it. Anyways, what did you do since we got here, Jill?" he asked.

"Nothing," said Jill.

"Nothing at all? Nothing to contribute to the work?"

"Nope."

"And you find that fair?"

"Yep."

"How so?"

Jill walked over to the cooler, grabbed a beer, opened it, and walked back. "I figure you guys can handle it," she said.

"That doesn't seem fair," said Leon.

She took a sip of beer and sat on a chair next to Leon's. "Life's not fair, kid, just deal with it," she said.

"Completely unfair," said Claire.

Jill glanced over. "Shut up, Claire, you didn't help either," she said, grinning.

Claire shook her head. "No, I mean it's not fair that you guys get your beer-cooler and I have to drink water all weekend because nobody thought of packing sodas," she said.

Jill got up and walked over to the cooler again, but this time she grabbed the whole thing and brought it back to the chair. She set it between the two chairs, grabbed another beer, sat down, and tossed it to Claire. "You don't put soda in a beer-cooler," she said.

Leon grabbed a beer and nodded. "That's basically what I said," he said.

"Cheers to that, my friend," said Jill, holding out her beer. It connected with Leon's and they each sipped their own.

"Does the term 'illegal' mean anything to you guys?" Claire asked.

"Not while I'm on vacation," said Jill.

"But you're a cop," said Claire.

"I'm on vacation."

"...cop."

"...vacation."

"Chris would kill me...and you."

"It was his idea," Jill said with a grin, taking another sip of her beer.

"It was his idea to take a cooler full of beer on a camping trip?" asked Claire, sounding more sceptical than she wanted.

"Yes."

"...Okay, well, if it was his idea," said Claire. She opened the can and tilted it up for a sip, but before any could pour out the can was taken out of her hands.

"Nope!" said Chris, walking over to the chairs with the beer.

"Change your mind, huh?" said Jill, grinning.

Chris nodded, drinking the beer.

Claire sighed and walked to a chair next to Leon's. "I don't really care what you guys decide or argue over, but I still wish someone had brought soda," she said.

Leon looked at Chris. "Dude, we're all on vacation," he said.

"I don't care, I changed my mind," said Chris.

"It won't do anything," said Jill.

"I don't care," said Chris.

"Chris, you'll grow up to be lame, boring, and alone."

Chris looked at Jill, who was pretending not to see him, and sighed. He grabbed a beer and tossed it at Claire. His aim was off, and the can hit Leon on the side of the head.

"OW!"

"Oops. I'm so sorry."

"Wow, Chris, try sounding a little more sarcastic there," said Leon. He took the can and handed it to Claire, smiling. "I believe this is for you."

"Why, thank you sir," Claire said, returning his dorky smile with her own.

"Anytime," he said, returning to his lounging and beer.

Claire opened the can and looked to Chris, who sighed and nodded. She nodded back and took a sip.

"Just don't make a habit of it," Chris said.

"Yes, mom," said Claire.


	4. Chickens

Jill grabbed another beer, as did Leon. "We should go swimming," he said.

"It'll be freezing," said Jill.

"So? That makes it more fun!"

"Sure...go have your fun, then," she said.

Leon sighed and turned to Claire, who was smiling. "You in?" he asked.

"Sure," she said.

"Why are you smiling?" he asked.

"Nothing really...I just never thought Jill would be afraid of a little cold water," she said.

Jill sat up straight. "I am NOT afraid, I'm just not stupid," she said.

Chris nodded. "She's right, going in that water at this time of year would be pretty stupid," he said.

Leon shook his head and looked back to Claire. "Well, at least two of us aren't chicken shits," he said.

Claire hit her beer against his. "Here here!" she said. Leon laughed.

"Hear that, Jill? Apparently, being smart makes us chickens," said Chris.

"I do hear it, Chris," said Jill. She took another sip and looked at him, her grin matching his.

Chris stood up, finished his beer, and stretched. "I think I'll head back to the tent...I'm getting scared that the cold water might jump out of the lake and attack me," he said as he started walking back towards the trees.

Jill got up as well. "I think that sounds like a good plan...those crazy water-monsters," she said. She followed Chris, still grinning.

Claire watched them go. "Loving the sarcasm, guys!" she said.

"Whatever, let them have their jokes, I still think they're chickens," said Leon.

"Agreed," Claire said, smiling. She looked over to Leon just as he was suddenly pulled off his chair. Chris was holding him under the arms, and Jill had his legs, as they carried him up a small cliff above the lake. Leon was squirming and yelling, but the others were just laughing.

"On three?" asked Chris, grinning.

"Sounds good," said Jill.

Claire stood up, laughing, and followed them. "Guys, that's just mean," she said.

"Called us chickens," said Chris.

"Three," said Jill.

"Guys, come on!" yelled Leon, squirming.

"Two," said Chris.

"I'll go in on m-"  
>"One," said Chris and Jill together. They swung him over the small cliff and launched him into the lake. He yelled until he hit the cold water, then the air was filled with the sound of laughter. Not from Leon, though.<p>

"YOU GUYS ARE DICKS, THIS IS FREAKING COLD!" yelled Leon.

Claire was laughing too. "I guess that'll teach him," she said.

Chris and Jill looked at each other, nodded, then turned to Claire. She stopped laughing and took a step back. "Now...hold on a second," she said.

They started towards her. "I do believe you agreed with him," said Jill.

Claire kept backing away slowly. "You're joking, right?"

"Nobody calls us chickens and gets away with it," Jill said.

"Sorry, Claire," said Chris.

Claire turned to her brother. "No, seriously, I don't wanna go in the lake," she said. They stopped walking towards her and looked at each other. Then, suddenly, they started running towards her. Claire yelled and turned to run back into the woods, but they got to her first.

Chris grabbed her arms the same way he had for Leon, but Jill was having a hard time getting a hold of her legs, since she kept squirming and kicking.

"Hold still!" said Jill, laughing.

Claire kept kicking. "NO!" she yelled, though she was laughing as well.

"Okay then!" said Chris. He turned around and backed up towards the lake, dragging his kicking sister behind him. "We'll just do it this way!"

"NOO!"

Chris went up the small cliff. "Sorry," he said, laughing.

Jill followed, more entertained by watching than actually helping.

"Fine! Have it your way!" yelled Claire. She put both her feet down on the ground and pushed off as hard as she could, sending them both over the cliff.

Once they hit the water, Chris let go and resurfaced. "Oh, GOD it's cold!" he yelled.

"That's what you get!" said Claire, grinning, but mostly at the cold.

Leon was floating in place, watching them. "I agree...karma's a bitch," he said.

Chris turned to him with a glare, but started laughing. "Well, I should've seen that coming," he said.

Up on the cliff, Jill stuck her head over the side and looked at them. "Um, guys? Did we even bring towels?" she asked.

Chris, Leon, and Claire all looked at her in pure shock. "Shit," said Chris.


End file.
